I can’t fight it anymore. Go on then, it’s Christmas! I spend most years in the run up to December 25th trying to hold back the cheer til the last possible minute. But it’s too much. I’ve been fighting too long. Pour me a vodka and cranberry and let’s get on with it.
No-one observes the 12 Days thing anymore – possibly because of the lack of evidence in modern, urban life of lords and geese leaping and laying, respectively. So, if I hold out til the actual day (like we used to in the olden times) then it’s all over too quickly. And while I hate that Christmas starts while the last jack-o’-lanterns are still smouldering, I’ve decided that, this year, I’ll hurl myself onto the bandwagon as it passes, instead of trying to ignore it and then desperately trying to catch up. It’s hard to leap aboard a bandwagon at full tilt.
So last night – two weeks early – I did the big Christmas clean. Things in my flat the never move were moved and scrubbed and shone and put back. They will not move again for quite some time. Soon, I will put my tree up and get a full 3 or so weeks out of it. But here’s the deal. On the 26th, it’s all over. No more tinsel. No more cheer. Tree down and I go back to being grumpy and cynical and the twinkle I’m currently reluctantly allowing to live in my eye will be turfed out and made homeless once more. If no one else does the 12 Days After thing (even the sofa manufacturer ads, who’ve had bells in their jingles since September) then I’ll make sure I get my 12 days in well in advance. Make that 21, I’m feeling generous.
There will be one tiny moment of reprieve post Boxing Day (ie Stephen’s Day, Irish readers…I know who I am). The London Comedy Improv – my favourite bunch of people to work with EVER, are having our Christmas shindig on the 30th of December. It’s normally a funny old date. Many people get back from wherever they’ve been for Christmas around then, and have nowhere to go. They’re broke. They’re disenchanted. They’re on parole for assaulting Uncle Mick because they couldn’t take one more Christmas cracker joke. Basically, it’s often a rubbish, grey-area day. Well we’re having a party. And guess what? You’re invited! Yes, we’ve decided – as a thank you to our regulars and because we’re just generally lovely that you can all get in for free to see some top notch comedy, based on your suggestions. All you have to do is join our Facebook group (London Comedy Improv) or follow us on Twitter (@LondonImprov) for details. Closer to the date, we’ll give out a password which lets you in to the show for FREE. Just bring a few friends with you – we want this to be brilliant, and we want to make new friends. Christmas can be so lonely…
Remember, this is only a reprieve. We revert to being cold, nasty, selfish comedians the next day. So make sure you get down there. It will be a never-to-be-repeated event.
Now excuse me, my egg-nog is on fire.
Don’t bah-humbug me! There’s still time to sponsor me for having run NYC marathon for Alzheimer’s Society here. Thanks.
